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Group Chats, Ground Rules: Setting House Norms Without Killing the Vibe

Every flat has “rules”. The healthy ones write them down. Learn how to turn Domu Match’s behavioural questions into simple, shared house norms before the group chat explodes.

February 2, 2026
7 min read
By Domu Match Team

Most student houses have rules. In the calm ones, they are written down. In the chaotic ones, they only appear as 37‑message group chat arguments at 1 a.m. Ground rules are not about being strict; they are about giving everyone the same script so you are not constantly guessing what is okay.

Students sitting around a table with phones and drinks, checking a group chat
Group chats are great for memes and logistics - but terrible as the only place to negotiate house rules.

Why Houses Without Ground Rules Feel So Tense

In a house with no clear norms, everyone quietly brings their own assumptions from family or past housing. One person thinks "open‑door policy, friends anytime"; another thinks "home = decompression zone". One person assumes dishes can wait a day; another sees anything left overnight as gross.

Psychologically, unclear expectations increase anxiety and conflict: you are constantly monitoring for whether you have crossed an invisible line. When friction finally surfaces, it often comes out as blame instead of collaboration.

Let Domu Match Do the Awkward Part

Domu Match already asks the uncomfortable questions during onboarding. Things like:

  • How often you want guests and overnight stays.
  • How long dishes sit in the sink.
  • Preferred quiet hours on weeknights and weekends.
  • Whether you prefer a social hub or a calm base.

That means you can use your compatibility report as a ready‑made agenda for your first house meeting. You are not inventing issues; you are simply turning existing answers into explicit agreements.

A Simple House-Meeting Template

Keep it short, specific and low‑pressure. For example:

  1. Noise & quiet hours – “What’s a reasonable quiet time on weeknights and weekends?”
  2. Guests & partners – “Roughly how many nights a week are people okay with overnight guests?”
  3. Cleaning system – “Do we want a rota, checklist, or another system? What’s the minimum standard?”
  4. Shared items – “What do we share - cleaning stuff, oil and spices, toilet paper? How do we split costs?”

Write the answers down in a simple note or document. You do not need legal language; you just need shared memory.

How to Use the Group Chat Without Letting It Explode

Some quick rules of thumb:

  • Use the chat for logistics (“bin day”, “delivery arrived”), not full conflicts.
  • If a thread starts spiralling, suggest a short in‑person chat instead.
  • Refer back to your agreed rules: “We said max 2 overnights a week - can we stick to that?”

The more specific your initial agreements, the less interpretation - and drama - the group chat has to carry.

Turn Matching Data Into House Rules

Domu Match gives you the raw ingredients: how everyone answered on guests, noise, cleanliness and more. You turn that into a simple, shared “house agreement” that you can revisit once or twice a semester.

You can start by creating a profile, matching with compatible housemates and then using their answers as a starting point for your first house meeting. Start that process on our sign‑up page.

Turn Quiet Expectations Into Clear Agreements

Domu Match surfaces the friction points - noise, guests, cleaning - so you can turn them into ground rules before they blow up your group chat.

Match with Rule-Compatible Roommates